Nilesh dalvi - mental torcher from wife - seek divorce
NILESH
(Querist) 11 May 2012
This query is : Resolved
Dear Sir / Madam,
Myself, a Maharashtrian boy got married in dec 2007 as per the Hindu Marriage Act.
now we have 1 daughter aged 3 years, we live in joint family ( with my parents ) in Mumbai – Thane.
but its been 4 years for my marriage, but we could not enjoy even a singly day of happiness. My wife had ruined our life. Myself, my father & my mother are suffering the pain every day & just waiting to either somehow get rid of it or die all together. It has been tremendous amount of mental torcher. Because of this my mother got sick, I got sick, my father had got paralysis attach recently & is due for angiography. We are dying day by day.
This is because my wife fights with me every day. she never respect me, my parents, my relatives, always insults them, very short tempered, extremely arrogent, egoestice, ghamandi girl. she did not marry me willingly. Actually she wanted to marry one person ( I dont know who was ), they fricked out together, spend lot of good time with each other. She proposed to him but he refused to marry her. As a result, my wife agreed to marry me just for the sake of marrying with somebody.
basically, she is from rich family where she always lived in comfort zone, happy life, big bunglow, cars, all sofistications in life. Whereas, i came up from a very poor family, i do not have even a bicycle. but with my education, hardwork & dedication i progressed & still progressing.
Previously we used to live in a small house in thane with a ICICI Bank home loan of 4 lacs. Since my wife was used to live in big house like at her mothers, she forced me to buy another house which was beyond my financial capacity. She made my life miserable till I bought this new house with another loan of 25 lacs. I was not in a position to bear this, at the same time lost my job, all worst things happened till I got another job. Inspite of this there is no peace of mind in our life.
I have been very honest with my wife & I had always been like that. I have never indulged myself in physical or any other relationship with anybody except my wife. In spite of knowing this, my wife torchers me every day, does not allow me have physical relationship for 3-4 months at stretch. What to do god!!!!!!!! as a result I get frustrated….naturally…but then she takes doubts about my honesty & insults in front of others.
my wife does not want to shoulder any responsibility, she do not even take good care of our daughter, always sleeping, always dausy, very dirty, in short she messed up my life. She is very selfish, cunning, cruel minded, extremely lazy, asks me to do all her work. More to this, her mother motivates her & all her parents & relates encourage her to such things.
Now my wife alongwith her mother have started some more mental torcher by forcefully coming & staying in my house & asking me to get out of my own house. My wife is saying she does not bother even if I die…. She did not cared right from day 1.
we all are now fed up of all this & want to get rid of it.
i want either judicial separation / divorce from my wife & also want to have the custody of my daughter who is 3 years old.
Please advise me on the following grounds:-
1 what is the best way for us to get rid of my wife?
2 what I need to do to get the permanent custody of my daughter?
3 I do not want to pay a single penny to my wife as alimony. Is it possible?
( this is because, in spite of being working & drawing a handsome salary, my wife did not contribute at all to our house for expenses & upbringing, medical treatment of my daughter).
4 I want to teach her & her in laws a real lesson for ruining our life &
making our every day like hell.
Please advise me what to do? Specifically on the above 4 points.
Please advise me step by step procedure to be followed.
Thanks & Regards
Nilesh Dalvi
Thanks & Regards
Nilesh Dalvi
9833085190
adv. rajeev ( rajoo )
(Expert) 11 May 2012
If she is ready for consent divorce, then go for it. Why unnecessary your are suffering.
ajay sethi
(Expert) 11 May 2012
nilesh dalvi
from the facts stated by you it appears your wiffe is not happy staying with you .
you have sttaed that you have taken loan for pruchase of house . in whose name is the flat ? in your single name or jopint name?
is your wife interested in divorce or not?
as far as custody is concerned since your daughter is young around 3 years old chances of you getting custody are slim . you may get visitation rights .
if your wife is highly qualifed and working you may not have to pay maintenance
SAINATH DEVALLA
(Expert) 11 May 2012
Mr.Dalvi,
If the facts stated by you are correct,you must have had a torcherous and turbulent life.The answer for your first point is immediately file a divorce.The other points will be dealt by the court.
Is a good family councelling a possibility?If so you can try once before proceeding further.Answer regarding your property in detail.
NILESH
(Querist) 11 May 2012
Dear friends,
thanks for ur replies..... it was such a relief hearing / reading what i actually felt & gone throug..... i really cant explain the relief i felt just now...
about my property:-
the property is in my name..... & the loan also is in my name......
we purchased this flat in 2009-2010 when we were already staying in small house on which ICICI home loan was active.....
i was financially not in a position to buy a new flat.... inspite of that my wife forced me to buy this flat.... costing rs.31 lacs.... i was cashless.... so i had to take loan from HDFC bank of 25 lakhs...the monthly emi is around 40 thousand.... & my overall household expenditure is around 60 thousand per month... i am only bearing all these exp & my wife do not give a simple rupee towards it... she only paid 1 lac eighty thousand rs. towards stamp duty at the time of purchasing flat....thats it....nothing before & nothing thereafter..... she has been giving money to her own brother without even asking or rather informing me.
ajay sethi
(Expert) 11 May 2012
how much is balance amount payable on loan? if your wife is earning request her to pay 50%EMI
the problem is divorce without consent of wife is difficult . it will go on for years .
if property has appreciated sell the flat pay off loan and be debt free. stay in rented flat .
Shonee Kapoor
(Expert) 11 May 2012
As various experts have advised, the easiest way is MCD.
The securing of custody and all can be done in MCD or else you can settle all other disputes and leave this question open for the court to decide on the welfare of the child principle.
Regards,
Shonee Kapoor
harassed.by.498a@gmail.com
NILESH
(Querist) 21 May 2012
yesterday.... my wife alongwith her 10-12 relatives & parents came to my house.....started their usual mental torcher...
inspite of knowing the fact that my parents are sick ( especially my father had recent paralysis attach & angeography ).. they purposefully came disturb us further more.
on the top of it, my wife was asking me leave my parents & stay with here seperately.... when i denied & asked her & her relatives to get out of my house, her brother & her father threatened to kill me....they were forcefully trying to stay in my house & were not willing to leave.... rather my wife finally told me also to leave....
now, i am the legal owner of this house which is still mortgaged to HDFC Bank towards home loan..... what legal rights i have to make sure that my wife can not stay a single day in my house??????
