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Senthil kumar (Recruitment)     10 September 2013

Cruel allegations from wife and family

Dear Concerned,

I am married about 1.7yrs ago,my wife is's behaviour was very adament and unconvincing on day to day activities and was irresponsible in housekeeping and cooking,this resulted in quarrels on a day to day basis.this resulted in our marital life also, i had great aversion with her because of her attitude,i convinced myself that i should not do anything seriously since it will affect our family.

 

She doesnt showed proper respect to me and my father.(Mother is no more).

 

Because of her attitude we had quarrels at midnight without a proper marital life.

one fine day went to the peak of quarrel and she used very vulgar languages till late night that resulted in slapping her.

As a result she complained against me to her parents and to the known circle that i am beating her on aday to day basis.

She started allegating that i am impotent  and started spreading the message to family members and known circle.

 

I was shocked.

We went to the doctor and went for test, my results were normal.

She provokes on a day to day basis and i am controlling myself on a day to day basis not to slap her again.

she is not willing for a divorce since her circle of people will insult her.

 

If in case she provokes me and i beat her, what kind of problems i should face? shall i go to human rights regarding this?

 

Please advice.



Learning

 15 Replies

fighting back (exec)     10 September 2013

let her make allegations, record the conversations secretly on mobile device with memory card (on memory card only)

while recording, you dont shout and abuse yourself.

let her make accusations of impotency, you file for divorce on the grounds of cruelty of accusing you of being impotent, spreading the word and defaming you in public, and include other allegations of cruelty in your petition. get ready for 498a and dV to fall on your head very

Senthil kumar (Recruitment)     10 September 2013

Ya ,thanks. i am ready for a divorce,but she will be completely against my decision.But she will provoke me to fight and magnify things as if i am a very cruel husband.

 

If she provokes me , i cant control myself and will slap her that may create issues?

 

if she/her family complaints on this what will happen in the police station?

dr g balakrishnan (advocate/counsel supreme court)     10 September 2013

that is possible. you need to be very patient. else trouble is there. 

fighting back (exec)     10 September 2013

hi senthil...slapping is not a solution to the problem, you just keep your cool, recording everything on a memory card, build up your case for divorce, because you need evidence, secondly start depositing money in her account through bank transfer only, this will help you save your skin in maintainence cases. keep all the bills of her medical bills handy, just to show that you are caring for her, remember these small things are going to help you in future.

fighting back (exec)     10 September 2013

secondly you have a strong ground for divorce, because she is calling you impotent, next time try to get this in recording and build your witnesses..because calling a husband impotent is cruelty on him and fit for divorce..........

498_final stage (Professional)     10 September 2013

I agree with Fighting back. However, you can keep the recordings using your phone as well and transfer it to another hard disk. You can always go for an authentication from www.truthlabs.org. they can verify your document grant you a certificate to be presented in the court

fighting back (exec)     10 September 2013

@498a_victim...i differ with you, the certification given by any external agency or pvt lab is not admissible as per my knowledge, though i am not 100% sure, but the court can get it done through the govt labs at a nominal cost, also the cost is exorbitant in pvt labs, so it is easier to preserve things on the memory cards itself and surrender it as evidence directly in court

498_final stage (Professional)     10 September 2013

Its not a private lab. It was inaugurated by P Chidambaram, Even CID use their findings. So it is certainly admissible. 

rising up again (FFF)     10 September 2013

hi senthil...

my case is almost as same as urs.. i was also provoked once and since then have been cool to ensure that nothing goes wrong from my side.. the experts givings comments are right here and u should not loose ur cool. also, collect as much proofs as u can...

intall cctv's in ur house, so that at anytime, she cannot accuse you of false DV and torture.. i have done that and trust it helps a lot. Also, meet 10 lawyers , pay their consultation fee's and take their advices too. it always helps to understand law better. al will give their advices, but follow ur brain.

whr r u based ?

 

 

498_final stage (Professional)     11 September 2013

My case is also same. I started getting threats after hardly 10 days of the marriage. Initially I did not take it seriously but day by day her she started being more aggressive. This was not a usual anger, to me it was a mental illness. But I think I am trapped in a gang who just marry to extort money and then target next one.

I did make audio recordings using my cellphone and had to save them in my computer otherwise should would have destroyed them. 

Where are you both based?


(Guest)

Dear Concerned,

I am married about 1.7yrs ago,my wife is's behaviour was very adament and unconvincing on day to day activities and was irresponsible in housekeeping and cooking,this resulted in quarrels on a day to day basis.this resulted in our marital life also, i had great aversion with her because of her attitude,

 

Opinion: It's only because of compatability issue ,It's because of the frequency of your thinking and her thinking goes in different wave lengths and doesn't match.No body Knows her spouse by only half an hour general meeting prior to the consent of marriage if it was arranged marriage.

 

i convinced myself that i should not do anything seriously since it will affect our family. She doesnt showed proper respect to me and my father.(Mother is no more). Because of her attitude we had quarrels at midnight without a proper marital life.

 

Opinion: The women who never show respect to her family i.e husband and his parents by her ego always ends with a dead marriage unless the husband is not Like our Mon-mohan singh who open's his mouth only when he eat's. .LOL:))

 

one fine day went to the peak of quarrel and she used very vulgar languages till late night that resulted in slapping her.

 

Opinion: It was what you were pretending not to do but alas you succumbed and shown your basic extinct. But it's natural for those who are Angry Young Man who could not tolerate abuse and ill about him and his parents.

But it was highly recommendable to Controlllllllllll

 

As a result she complained against me to her parents and to the known circle that i am beating her on aday to day basis. She started allegating that i am impotent and started spreading the message to family members and known circle.

 

Opinion: You have slapped her with your hand and she slapped with rumours.....Nothing strange in that.If your poised and biased with her ill mouthing then just record all her chants and sweet ringtones which she used to deliver like alarm clock...:))

 

I was shocked. We went to the doctor and went for test, my results were normal.

 

Opinion: Do you taken her allegations seriously or  you have some doubts that you went for examinations?

That's gud keep that positive record along with you,it will be needed to counter her.

 

She provokes on a day to day basis and i am controlling myself on a day to day basis not to slap her again.

Opinion: How you pretends? just follow Baba Ram Dev's KapalBharti to control your mind and health..)):

Never be as Horny until or unless it is not asked on the bed.

 

 

she is not willing for a divorce since her circle of people will insult her.

 

Opinion: This is the general perception of rational unpeace women.

 

If in case she provokes me and i beat her,what kind of problems i should face? shall i go to human rights regarding this? Please advice.

 

Opinion: No Human rights will help you if she has proof of beating to her.

Just control your emotions and be as a common harassed husband who never beats her wife but her wife beats her....Then only you can win your case.

P.N- Follow LCI Family forum and criminal forums last 1 year query based on False cases,divorce & maintenance etc. all are here.

In case if it is urgent,Hire a competent Lawyer and solve your query face to face.

 

regards.

1 Like

Senthil kumar (Recruitment)     12 September 2013

Dear Friends,

 

Thanks for the immediate responses.

 

As mentioned earlier, her father came to my home and provoked me to fight and used world's best vulgar languages about me and my family members, i have recorded everything.

 

After 1 hour of provocation,they went to a police complaint of false petition of dowri harassment against me and my family and of impotentiality.

Since the inspectors and S.I were busy and not available because of vinayaga chaturthi,they were asked to come on saturday.

Meanwhile i was asked in the police station that i should not go to my rented apartment to avoid dispute.

 

i am staying with my father.

Friends, can anyone tell me whether i can go for human rights commission regarding this false allegations and ill treatment against me for the last 1.7yrs because of her stupid attitude and false allegations and usage of vulgar languages?

 

If in case i am asked to come to the police station, what kind of queries they will ask?

 

regards,

Senthilkumar.G

Coimbatore.

Nandha (NIL)     14 September 2013

@senthil,

 

Similar thing happened to me as well.  I slapped once but after one year of the incident she complained to the police station that I tried to kill her creating false evidences!!

 

you have mentioned that you had slapped your wife once. Thank God, she did not approach police station immediately after the incident. Whether you slap our of anger or not, a slap is always considered as physical harassment and she can book you under different sections of the gender biased law.

 

anyway, she has now approached police station and has started the litigation. It's time for you to act. 

1) Hire a local lawyer immediately. Brief him about your case.

2) With the help of lawyer and contacts, try to get a copy of her complaint at the police station. If there is no written complaint, just go the police station with your lawyer and brief the Officer about what you have encountered.  Befriend some of the Police personnel  so that you can get information if your wife is planning to file dowry harassment case etc.,

3) Next , when police call you at the police station, take your lawyer with you. Do not go alone!

 

all the best for peaceful life!


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